I was being interviewed for the book Finding Inclusivity by Paula Mould. As I was telling her my story, I kept saying “I’m shy.” When I was done my story, she said “I don’t think you’re shy. You should tell yourself a different story.” So after hanging up the phone, I turned to Google, curious, and asked “What is the opposite of shy?” You know what the reply was? “Confidence!”
So many times we tell ourselves a story as to what our identity is. Oftentimes this story can be damaging.
I’m not smart enough.
I don’t have enough money.
What story do you tell yourself?
I was in an office the other day and saw this sign sitting on a woman’s desk.
I thought it was cute and funny but it didn’t give me much confidence in the woman’s professional ability. In fact, I wondered if I should be doing business with her at all! She obviously doesn’t have much confidence in herself.
Listen to the stories you tell yourself. What are you portraying to others? Are you exuding confidence or do you need to re-write your story?
Many people are ashamed of themselves. Many people who contact me don’t feel they are “Passable” or good enough to go out dressed in the real world. They end up staying at home, missing out on all the fun. But, after talking to me and deciding to spend a couple hours with me, learning how to apply cosmetics or how to shop for the right clothes or being fitted for a beautiful new wig, they suddenly start looking at themselves in a more positive light.
I assure you, if you have confidence, it really doesn’t matter how you look or what you wear. People will love you, include you, and want to be around you, as long as you have confidence in yourself.
A Fun Exercise in Confidence
Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and said “I love you”?
Try it again.
And again and again until you believe it. At first you might think it’s stupid. then after awhile you might cry. Then, by the end, when you get it, you will be laughing!
Give it a try!
Adding Confidence to Your World
Really, the best way to improve your confidence is to hang around with other confident people.
- Examine your friends, including Facebook friends. Are they positive people or do they suck you down?
- Read inspirational books
- Don’t indulge in gossip at work
- Attend a class or seminar to boost your knowledge and self esteem as well as make new friends
- Go to a convention to meet like-minded peers
- Clear the clutter in your calendar or home that feeds into insecurities
If you don’t know any positive people who can get you on track, or if you really need a boost and fast, consider Confidence Coaching. Leanne, Transformation Maven of Lesada is a skilled Confidence Coach. Her 12 week program is designed to boost your energy, heighten your self awareness and sky rocket your confidence in yourself! To find out if this program is for you, simply book your 60 Minute Life Clarity Call. You will walk away from the call with valuable insight as to what direction you should be headed and what your next steps should be to ensure you are Stepping Out In Confidence!
What could you achieve if only you owned a different story? Comment your dreams below!