How to Keep Your Pretty Things Pretty!

Let’s face it, I know some some of you have all of your secret, pretty things hidden away in a duffle bag in the back reaches of your darkest closet! But when you get to pull them out, wouldn’t it be lovely if they were still beautiful and not a dusty, wrinkled mess? Here are a few tips to get organized and be pretty at the same time!

Choosing a Bag

Your bag should have several side pockets and a large interior opening. In this case, size does matter! Choose a bag that is much bigger than what you think you will need. This will allow your items enough room so they don’t get crushed as well as give you room to expand your collection. You will also want to get a cosmetic roll up bag. These bags have multiple pockets and roll up into a tight compact bag.   One more bag to invest in would be a velvet shoe bag. This will protect shoes from scratches. It will also protect all the rest of your items from getting poked by a high heel or getting dirty from the shoes.

Dividing Your Items

Separate your items first. Place all small items in a cosmetic bag. Items for this bag include jewellery, scarves, pantyhose, makeup, hair and nail accessories. Put shoes in a separate shoe bag. Wigs and breast forms should be stored in a box or zip closure bag with tissue paper. And last, separate your clothing, preferably into outfits. Skirts with blouses or slacks and tops that you wear together. This will save you time if you only have a a short time to dress, your outfits will be ready and waiting for you. You may also wish to place bras, panties and other lingerie all together in a pretty lace bag.

Packing Your Bag

Use the exterior pockets for lingerie, pantyhose and scarves. The cosmetic roll up will fit into the exterior end pockets. Reserve one side of your bag interior for heavier items like shoes and boxes. Carefully wrap all clothing in tissue paper and roll tightly. This not only saves you a ton of space, but, when done carefully, minimizes many wrinkles. There’s nothing worse than finally being able to slip into that silky blouse and finding it a wrinkled disgrace. Place clothing in other side of the bag interior. This should leave room on top for your purse or other accessories. One last thing you may want to add to your bag is a photo album. Include photos of yourself or inspirational photos to help you add to your secret bag.

Place a checklist on the very top of everything in your bag. This will assist you next time you dress so you don’t worry about leaving anything behind. Make sure you update your list as you add or delete items. This is especially helpful with small items like cosmetics and hair accessories.

Create a checklist to make sure you haven’t forgotten to pack anything after dressing.

Storing Your Bag

Finding a place to store your bag may be the trickiest part. Choose a location that is easily accessible. You want to be able to bring it out whenever you want. Easily accessible places may include a closet, your car, the garage, basement or other spot on your property. Just make sure your bag isn’t going to end up taking on a musty smell. Perfume doesn’t cover odours! Inserting a bag of lavender or freshening pouch in your bag will aide in odours.

If you don’t feel comfortable storing your bag on your property, you can rent a locker, use Lesada’s bag storage service or keep things at your office or a friend’s place. Where there is a will, there’s a way!

If you need to undress quickly, make sure to go back later and repack your bag with care for the next time you get to dress. Honouring the beauty of your clothes and belongings will strengthen the confidence you have in your own beauty. Taking the time to pack your bag with care will reduce stress during your special time of getting ready.

I hope you enjoyed this article, please comment below your tips for storing and packing your pretty things.

Top 5 Reader Recommendations!

 

As you know, I love hearing everyone’s stories. By talking to people, I have made some amazing discoveries that have made my life easier! By talking to others, sharing experiences, successes and disappointments, we learn what works and what doesn’t for people. Read on to learn the Top 5 Recommendations from my clients. Then share your recommendations of products, hacks and tips in the comments below!

#5 Quick Fix

If you use silicone breast forms, one day you may need a quick repair job. Tamara recommends using silicone adhesive to repair minor punctures for a short term fix. This won’t repair them indefinitely, but will certainly tide you over until a replacement can be shipped. Check out this tutorial for help.

#4 Only One Glue Will Do

Speaking of adhesives, have you ever attempted to glue your eyebrows? Elle has discovered that Elmer’s stick glue is the best brand for this. Elle also advises to apply rubbing alcohol on a cotton pad and thoroughly clean your eyebrows before doing anything else. The alcohol will dissolve any oils and provide a clean base to help the glue adhere even better.

#3 Easy Hair Removal

Pauline advises that we use an epilator to quickly and effectively remove unwanted hair from the neck down. Acting like a dozen tweezers, an epilator pulls hair from legs, arms and body. You may need to shave a tiny bit, but it keeps stubble to a minimum. Over time, regrowth is inhibited as well. Pauline has tried a few different brands and recommends Philips Satinelle model, available on Amazon and Walmart for about $45.00.

Pauline recommends Philips Satinelle Epilator for body hair removal

#2 Professional Photos Always

Bathroom selfies be gone! with a cell phone tripod recommended by Frannie. Available on Amazon for only about $20-$35 you can take beautiful poses and videos with the click of a remote button. This tripod wraps on to things or stands on it’s own so you don’t have to pose in front of a mirror or take extremely close up selfies. Frannie has taken her mini cell tripod to the park and around town for a professional photo session created by herself. Check it out, you’ll be glad you did!

Get professional shots with a cell phone tripod recommended by Frannie

#1 Shop En Femme

Heather had the brilliant idea to keep her feminine expenses separate by obtaining a VISA card in her feminine name. When you own a VISA credit product in your legal name, you can get additional cards for family members by only providing their name. Using her masculine name as the primary account holder, she was able to obtain an additional card for Heather. Now she is free to shop completely en femme as well as keep her feminine purchases separate from her other expenses. Please note, that all purchases for both credit cards appear on the same bill, so if you are sharing the account with a spouse, keep this in mind.

What tip made you say A-HA!? What tips or recommendations can you share with others? Comment below!

Urge to Purge

Lindsay recounted wistfully the details of a beautiful white pantsuit she used to own. It fit her perfectly and made her feel like a million bucks. But it was lost to a purge.

Ashley had an insanely gorgeous champagne coloured ball gown that had pearls around the bodice. It too, went out to the second hand shop in a wild purge that she regrets to this day.

What possessed these girls to discard their beautiful belongings, then regret it so much?

A Personal Story of Purging

Rachel, a 37 year-old closet crossdresser spent hours online shopping for specialty themed outfits. She wanted the hot mom look – tight leggings, an off-the-shoulder cropped sweat top, bangle bracelets and pink eye shadow. Then there was the ballgown phase – huge hair, tiaras, sparkling chandelier earrings and a sparkly fitted gown with miles of tulle and rhinestones. Oh, and we can’t forget the sexy, businesswoman wardrobe! It wouldn’t be complete without a tight pencil skirt, button down white shirt blouse and a pair of sexy glasses. So much stuff!!!

It was so fun checking the mailbox and having a parcel arrive almost daily!

Exciting Packages!!!

 

Until the credit card bill arrived one day in the mailbox amongst the packages.

Rachel was horrified to see how much she had spent on herself and the ‘silly’ purchases she had made. Most of the things she bought were cheaply made and didn’t even fit right. They had brought a thrill to her when she was opening up the packages, but also stressed her out that someone would find her beautiful things.

She decided “once and for all” that she was never going to shop online again. She decided she was stupid for buying all these girly things and she should just forget it all. Rachel believed she would never be passable. And she definitely would never get a girlfriend if they knew this side of her, she thought.

And in one big fit of self doubt and personal anger, she gathered every last shred of girlyness into a giant garbage bag and drove to the clothing donation bin.

The lid slammed with an echo of finality.

The Reasoning Behind The Purge

Many closet crossdressers, like Rachel, Lindsay and Ashley, are ashamed of their feminine side. They are constantly battling against how they feel inside and how they want people to perceive them as men. They feel that if anyone were to find out they enjoy wearing ballgowns or tiaras or short skirts, their world as they know it would be lost. In their male world they hold down very masculine jobs, such as construction workers and truck drivers, or high powered, high stress careers like lawyers or emergency responders. A lot of crossdressers are also business owners, husbands and fathers. They are ashamed to reveal their feminine longings to others.

Many crossdressers are ashamed of their feminine longings.

It is for this reason, that a purge of all feminine belongings occurs. And sometimes quite often.

The fear of getting caught with a closet full of women’s clothes, wigs, high heels, and other lady-like accessories instigates a mass purge, followed by massive regret.

How to Resist the Urge to Purge

If you are like one of the girls in this article, you are probably wondering how to feel good about your purchases, love your girly belongings and not fight who you truly are. Here are a few tips to overcome the urge to purge.

  • Limit your purchases. When you carefully select items to add to your collection, rather than buying everything in sight, you will feel more confident about your purchases and keep spending habits in check.
  • Don’t buy mix-matched articles. When making a purchase, choose items that will complement each other. If you buy a top, get a skirt to match. You won’t regret having a pile of clothes that look like they were picked out by a three year old girl playing dress up.
  • Store your items lovingly. If your belongings are packed with care, you may be less likely to garbage them.
  • If you are susceptible to purging, write a note to your future self, reminding you how much you love and need those items to be your true, happy self. Place the note with some photos on the top of your bag or on your closet door.
Remind yourself how happy you were when you were being your true self!
  • Tell a trusted friend. When you reveal your secret to just one person, it doesn’t seem as scary.
  • Rent a storage locker. If you are afraid a new girlfriend, wife or parent is going to come across your secret stash, store it somewhere more private, yet still accessible. (Lesada offers storage in London, Ontario for a very nominal fee!)
  • Purge in small quantities. We all make regrettable purchases from time to time, especially online. If you bought items that don’t fit or don’t suit you, get rid of those things. Make sure your next purchases are items that will match and work with your articles that make you feel great.
  • Speak with Leanne, Transformation Maven and Life Coach. If you are fighting the urge to purge because you are ashamed of who you truly are, you are not alone. Leanne specializes in coaching crossdressers to value their self worth and confidence. Book a Free 15 Minute Call or in-depth 60 Minute Life Clarity Call today!

Have you ever regretted a purge? Tell your story in the comments below.

 

 

 

 

Pride Without a Parade

Pride Parades are over-the-top, flamboyant, loud, exciting displays, but we should display pride in who we are everyday, not just during a Parade!

I was planning to attend a massive Pride Parade in Toronto. I bought a group bus ticket so I didn’t have to drive in a congested, unknown city when there were hundreds of thousands of people there. But, unfortunately, the bus, unbeknownst to me, had been cancelled due to low ticket sales. So, I didn’t get to go. But I was able to watch a portion of it on television. The announcers were interviewing many people, asking what Pride meant to them.

What Does PRIDE Mean?

Many people responded to the reporters that Pride meant inclusivity, acceptance, and being their true selves. Not many people mentioned that they associate Pride with sexual orientation, gender identity or fighting for rights, which was the intention of the Parade when it began years ago. 38 Years ago, in Toronto! Most people want to belong, live life the way they want to and express themselves in a way they feel comfortable.

As I was sitting in my car, all decked out in my rainbow wig and t-shirt, I got thinking. How can we carry the Spirit of Pride with us, wherever and whenever we are?

Show PRIDE by Supporting Others

The best way to share the accepting, inclusive spirit of Pride is to learn about others. Ask their name, what pronouns they prefer, and any other questions you want clarified. When you approach people with curiosity, rather than judgement, people are very willing to open up to you. It is through education and understanding that acceptance is born.

You can also show your openness and acceptance by displaying the Pride flag on your car or window, or by wearing an Ally button or bracelet. Even if you don’t identify under the LGBTQ umbrella, you can display your support and friendship in beautiful ways.

Display the Pride Ally symbol to show your support.

Show PRIDE by Educating Yourself

Learn all the identifying definitions and terms. There are so many! Remember there are a lot of “boxes” that people use to explain who they are. But not everyone fits into a “box”.  And “boxes” don’t always need a definition. It’s ok to accept people as they are without defining who they are. But if people want to identify with a certain term, please do your best to understand and be open with their definitions.

There are many other books, articles and videos that highlight individual stories of coming out, struggles and successes. You can show compassion for others by listening to them and sharing your own stories.

Show PRIDE by Accepting Others

Everyone is unique, it’s not a new concept. We are different from our neighbours, siblings, parents, friends, no two people are alike. We are most likely drawn to others who are similar and may be turned off others who are very different.

During the Pride Parade, you will see a lot of differences. You will see bare bums, buckets of glitter, promiscuity, colourful hair, extreme piercings and many other socially wild things. And even if you wouldn’t be caught dead gyrating in the street like some people at Pride, you can still agree to accept your differences in the way you have fun in this world. Also, at Pride, people get caught up in the loud, pulse, energy of the crowd and get carried away. It doesn’t mean that the way people act during the parade are how they are everyday in their home. So be accepting of how people chose to come out, get out of their own confines, and live it up from time to time.

To read individual stories of how others see themselves, visit Lesada Community.

Show PRIDE by Being Yourself

The most beautiful way you can display your love, acceptance and spirit of Pride is to go confidently into the world and love yourself. Sometimes loving yourself is harder than loving others. If you can love yourself, with all your flaws and perfections, shortcomings and successes, you can most certainly feel pride in other’s qualities. Shining your light bright enough for others to follow can make a huge difference in this world. Self acceptance and pride in yourself is the greatest gift you can give! Recognizing yourself in others contributes to respect, love and understanding as well.

Be proud of who you are everyday! Share in the Spirit of Pride, even if you can’t make it to the Parade.

Share your thoughts below on how you show your Pride support.

Summer Fashion Beat the Heat for Crossdressers

Crossdressing in the Summer can be sweltering! Wig, breast forms, bras, waist cinchers, butt pads, long sleeves to cover arm hair, two layers of stockings to cover leg hair, and makeup melting on your face, it’s not a pretty sight in the unrelenting summer heat. So what can a girl do to stay cool and fresh? These Summer Fashion clothing tips are sure to keep you cool as you enjoy the summer fun.

Free your Feet for Summer Fashion

  • Paint your toenails a bright, bold colour to make a hot summer fashion statement. Coral, teal, red or neon pink are guaranteed to make a splash! If you think your feet or toenails are too big and will appear manly, minimize the size by creating a design, or use two different colours on one nail. If your nails are highlighted with colour, the eye will be drawn there, not to the rest of your foot.
  • Wear open toed sandals, flip flops or flats. Summer is for running, swimming, hanging out with friends by a campfire. There is no need to look like you walked off the runway in sky-high heels! Ditch the heels and tread lightly in some fun, light footwear.
Minimize the size with a design or two-tone colours

Show Off Those Legs! (Or Not)

  • If you got it, flaunt it! If you opt to shave your legs, all the power to you! Wear skirts, shorts or sundresses to reveal what’s been hidden all winter.
  • If shaving your legs is not an option, you don’t have to swelter in the heat under layers of stockings. Instead, choose a long, floor length, flowy dress or skirt. Also look for bright, bold patterns or pleats to hide any other manly body parts, excess weight or other things you usually try to cram into a pair of stockings! Fabrics should be heavy enough to not be see-through, but light enough to be breathable.
  • Show off your enviable leg-length and be in hot Summer Fashion with elastic, high-waisted, straight-legged pants. It doesn’t matter what colour, dark or light, these types of pants are sure to keep you loose, cool and feeling sexy.

 

High waisted elastic pants are cool and flowy
Long, bold patterned skirts hide many manly body features

Waist Cinchers and Corsets be Gone!

  • Breathe a sigh of relief from the heat! Ditch the cincher and choose breathable Summer Fashion instead. Bamboo is a revolutionary fabric that wicks moisture away and keeps you cool.
  • Opt for optical illusions! Look for dresses and clothing styles that create the illusion of curves. Search for dresses that have colourful fronts and backs with darker sides. Other options to create waist curves are belts, side ruching, decorative buckles and bows.
Give yourself instant curves with a silhouette illusion dress
Create an hourglass figure with ruching and belts

Summer Fashion to Cover your Arms

  • Sweaters and long sleeves aren’t really an option in the summer heat. To cover muscular or hairy arms and shoulders, try a light wrap. A large silky scarf or lightly knitted poncho are great, airy summer options.
  • Instead of hiding your shoulders, highlight them with peasant type blouses or off-the shoulder tops. This Summer Fashion adds a flirtiness to your look while keeping you cool.
  • Go lacy if you need the comfort of long sleeves. Choose a dark colour to hide hair, or go for a lighter look with whites and creams.
a lacy top over a bright tank will cover up, but stay cool
Wear a light beach cover-up to stay cool, yet fashionable
Highlight your shoulders with a blousy, long sleeve off-the-shoulder top

Summer Fashion Accessories

  • Accessorize your look with hats, bags, jewellery, scarves, fun belts and don’t forget sunglasses!
  • Remember the hottest summer look you can rock is a smile, so wear yours boldly and get out there in the Summer Heat, with these awesome Summer Fashion hits!
  • Check out Summer Beauty tips for Crossdressers to Beat the Heat for great makeup tips to keep your face from melting this summer.

Comment below your favourite tip or summer fashion secret!

 

Summer Beauty Tips for Crossdressers to Beat the Heat

With summer fast approaching, most people start thinking about the beach, picnics, fun in the sun and and other outdoor activities. But what if you don’t want to go out because you’re afraid your face will melt off?! Don’t let the summer heat ruin your fun or your makeup. These Summer Beauty tips will be sure to keep you looking fresh, and feeling fun and playful in the Summer Heat!

Summer Beauty Makeup Tips for your Foundation

  • Double check your colour. As your skin tans in the summers rays, you will need to change your foundation colour. You’ll want to look as natural as possible without using a ton of foundation. The best way to do this is to ensure you are using the right colour.
  • Try a CC Cream. CC stands for complexion corrector. It is a light liquid application, thinner than liquid foundation. Many CC Creams also have SPF protection in them. Use a CC cream on your forehead, cheeks, chin and nose just to even out your skin tone and blend any concealers you might be using.
  • Powder it up! Use a foundation or translucent powder on your face after applying your foundation. Powder helps diminish oiliness, shininess and helps to keep your makeup from shifting. Pack some in your purse with a brush for quick touch ups throughout the day.
  • Use blotting papers. Available from most cosmetics counters, blotting papers are discreet little pieces of tissue paper that you can use to control oil and sweat on your face. Unlike a Kleenex, it won’t rub your makeup off, it will just soak up any oil or sweat from your skin. Other products you might like to try are oil mattifiers and foundations specifically designed for oily skin.

Summer Beauty Makeup Tips for your Eyes

  • Lighten your look with pale colours. Use light eye colours such as beige, creams, light pinks and pale browns. If you are prone to sweating, these lighter colours won’t be as noticeable if they happen to run or smear out of place.
  • Use Cream Eye Colours. Cream eye shadow comes in a small pot and is applied with a brush or your finger. Once on, it stays in place much better than mineral eye shadows. They do not crease, smear or run. Cream eye shadows are perfect for hot, sweaty, or oily eye lids.
  • Try waterproof mascara. Waterproof mascara is not to be used daily, but if you are going to be swimming, sweating a lot, or crying at a summer wedding, waterproof is the way to go.
Lighten your look with pale, natural colours for your eyes, lips and foundation

Summer Beauty Tips for your Lips

  • Use a lip liner. Have you ever experienced your lipstick bleeding beyond your lip line? That’s because you didn’t use a liner to create a barrier. Lip liners will keep your lipstick from migrating off your lips and will hold it in place longer.
  • Lighten up with lip gloss. Dash out the door and off to a picnic with a smack of lip gloss! Lip gloss is already in a liquid state, so you don’t need to worry about it melting or smearing on your face.
  • Lighten your look with pale colours. Same as for your eyes, choose lighter lip colours such as pale pink, apricot or a light golden colour.

Other Fun Summer Beauty Tips

  • Wear SPF protection. There’s nothing worse than a red, sunburned, skin-peeling  nose or shoulders. Do yourself and your health a favour by using sunscreen.
  • Wear a hat.  Wearing a big-brimmed hat will shade your face, keep you cooler, and in turn ensure your makeup is kept intact. Plus, hats are super fun and will turn heads in a positive way!
  • Tie your hair back. With your hair off your neck and face, you’ll feel cooler and sweat less.

If you follow these simple summer beauty makeup tips, you can go out, worry-free to enjoy some fun in the sun! Do you have some great beauty hacks you want to share? Comment below!

Fun Femme Outings! for Crossdressers

No one likes to be all dressed up with no where to go! When you’re dressed up, feeling gorgeous and on top of the world, it’s awesome to keep that feeling alive by enjoying an outing. Sometimes the thrill of dressing is enough to satisfy, but after awhile, you are going to want to share your beautiful self with the world. And if you’ve already enjoyed an outing or two,  I know you will want to do more and more with your femininity. So read on to get some new ideas for Fun Femme Outings!

A Hesitant Outing

If you’ve never dared to go out before, it’s time you did! Here are a few basics just to get your high-heeled foot out the door.

  • Go out on your back deck, balcony or stand inside the garage with the big door open. Breathe deeply for 5-10 minutes and smile at the world.
  • Take your car for a short drive, even if it’s at night, around town.
  • Take a walk to the mailbox, corner store or nearest intersection.

An Alone Outing

Once you’ve mastered leaving the house, you’ll want to spend some time testing your limits and building your confidence on a more thrilling outing. Here are some fun things you can do alone, without needing to involve anyone from the outside world.

  • Go to a park, sit on a bench and read a book or walk your dog.
  • Go to a large store or mall and wander around, you don’t need to buy anything. You don’t even need to go in, just stand in the parking lot!
  • Go to a drive-thru and place your order. Have cash and a smile ready for the cashier.
  • Go to the bank machine, dry cleaners, return your library books, or do any other regular errands that are simple and routine to you.

A Confidence Building Outing

The fun and thrills can really start to mount when you have the confidence to interact with other people! These people will probably be strangers, but make sure you look at them, speak up so they can hear you and smile, smile, smile! Remember you are not ashamed of who you are. What you are doing is not illegal and you have every right to live your life the way you want to. So, go, have fun and be proud of who you are!

  • Go to a cafe and sit in the front window.
  • Go shopping and try stuff on, make a purchase if your budget allows.
  • Visit an art gallery, museum, tourist attraction or point of interest.
  • Attend a seminar or talk geared for women.
  • Go to a nightclub.
  • Visit a salon for a mani/pedi.

A Making Friends Outing

Going out alone can be thrilling, but after awhile, it can seem routine. You’ll start wishing you had a friend to shop with, eat with, laugh with. Consider the friends you already have. Can you, or have you, revealed your true self to any of them? Would they be willing to go out with you? Try these tips to have a fun experience with others.

  • Book a Girl’s Day Out with Leanne from Lesada.
  • Find some new friends in your area from online sources or social media. Be sure they are local though, so you can actually go out with them.
  • Revisit all those places you went to alone and start talking to other people who are there and make friends with them.

The Ultimate Outing

Once you have confidence, a smile on your face, the taste of new thrilling experiences and friends at your side, the world is yours for the taking! You will no longer consider your outings as “Femme Outings,” but rather just outings and fun times. Your outings will be a way of life and you will wonder how it was ever scary or difficult to step out onto your front porch.

  • Attend a group event or support group fun night.
  • Travel to a convention, such as Fabulous at the Falls, Gal’s Spring Fling, WildSide Las Vegas, TG Detroit, etc.
  • Get your girlfriends together for a sleepover. Go to a hotel, cottage or resort.
  • Party it up at a club.
  • Host a direct sales shopping night party.
  • Throw a movie night with the girls.
  • Go bowling, play laser tag or mini golf with a bunch of friends.
  • Give each other makeovers and giggle about boys like a bunch of teenagers!

No matter what stage you are at in your Outing Confidence Level, just have fun! Life is way too short to worry about what others think. Make your own choices, stretch your own limits and Step Out in Confidence!

Leave a comment below describing your Fun Femme Outing experiences!

Managing Femme Outings for Crossdressers

Are you nervous about taking an en femme outing? Do you worry about all the planning that seems necessary in advance?

I had the pleasure of speaking with Harietta during her free 15 minute scheduled call. Harietta said to me, “Let’s face it, we all love enhancing our inner femme.  But I dread the notion of being “clocked” or “read” as a man while wearing a dress in public. I feel my life would collapse if I was recognized in public for the true man I am. So, as a crossdresser, I have learned to ‘manage’ my outings.” Even though Harietta wants to keep her femme identity secret, she doesn’t let it deter her from going out in public and having fun!

Harietta went on to explain everything she does to ease her nervousness and boost her confidence when going out en femme.

Managing Femme Outings

What exactly does it mean to “Manage” your outings?

Thinking of your outing as a well choreographed experience will relieve stress and therefore enhance your outing. Planning everything in advance will ensure you haven’t forgotten anything or get caught off guard by something as simple as needing to use the washroom.

Several Days in Advance of Your Outing

Harietta advises,

  • Plan your outing – “I always know where I’ll be driving, where I’ll be parking, where I’ll be going, where I’ll be eating and where I’ll be peeing. Yahoo or Google Maps are great for this. Scout the place out in drab before. While out, you will need to use the ladies washroom, so make sure you know where it is.” Or, choose a small cafe that has only one washroom.
  • Wear your shoes around the house. Sometimes shoes need time to mold to your feet and you might need time to re-familiarize yourself with walking in heels.
  • Take extra special care of your skin days before and exfoliate the night before your outing so that there is no redness blasting through your foundation.
  • Consider heading out of town – If you really need to keep your identity secret, consider travelling out of town for a day or even two for a worry-free  romp.
  • Tucking Tip!  “If you insist on tucking you must practice it well at home. And you should spend some real time tucked in guy/drab mode to test your system.  It may take time to get to the point where twenty minutes in the car is not torture. When you go out en femme and tucked, make sure you have some regular undies and some wipes. Also consider that if you tuck those boys up there it displaces your bladder. Tight gaffs and undies make it worse. So limit the liquids, especially coffee, before you tuck.”

The Day of the Outing

  • Look your best “No matter how much I’ve paid for it, or if I have done it myself, I will not go out with sub-par hair and makeup, even from a pro. I worry about getting noticed if it’s not right, and it distracts from my enjoyment of the episode. I always tell the receptionist about my gender fluidity in advance.”
  • Pack Extra- “Always have a full set of man clothes and makeup remover in the car with a big blanket or comforter to change under in case things go south and you have to bail or answer a family emergency.”
  • Make a checklist of every item you take with you on your outing. Harietta reported she’s gone nuts wondering where her lip plumper went when she hadn’t actually included it in her kit!
  • Check the weather and traffic reports to avoid tie-ups and delays, especially if you have decided to take a your excursion to another city.

And the Most Important Tips…

  • HAVE FUN! 
  • Take a ton of photos!
  • Talk to people!
  • Do something you’ve always wanted to do!
  • Be yourself!

Hopefully, armed and prepared for the best you will be able to maximize your femme time and really enjoy your outing, while boosting your confidence at the same time.

Do you have any great tips on how you manage your outings? Leave a comment below!

Feminizing Your Office Crossdresser Tips

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to tell if a man or woman occupies a space? In most instances you can make the distinction immediately, but maybe you can’t lay your finger on exactly what elements comprise those differences. Read on to discover what nuances and minor touches you can add to your work space to give a more feminine impression.

Leave Personal Care Items Out

Feminizing your office immediately is as simple as leaving your personal care items in plain site on your desk. Items such as hand cream, emery boards, tube of lipstick or chap stick and snack bars/fruit have high impact in a subtle way. A sweater on the back of your chair or an extra pair of heels under your desk reinforces that a woman is occupying the space.

Use Feminine Desk Accessories

This seems like a no-brainer, but how you store your generic office items really makes a world of difference in the distinction between masculine and feminine. Women tend to display a lot more items than men do, giving a more cluttered feel to the space. If you usually keep your pens, scissors and stapler in a drawer, feminize your office by putting items in a cup on top of your desk instead. The cup doesn’t have to be covered in flowers, it could be a plain glass jar, just setting them out creates a feminine atmosphere. Other more feminine things to display include girly tissue boxes, softly coloured binders, desk calendar with lovely photos or inspirational quotes, some little knick-knacks and nice baskets to store your loose papers.

Display office items in a cup

Feminize your Office with Living Things

Women are nurtures. Add a living element to your space to heighten the sense of a woman being there. It could be as simple as a cactus or small houseplant or more complex like a Betta fish in a bowl or vase with a plant. If you can’t keep a plant alive or aren’t allowed to keep pets in your office, get a plastic plant instead, it still gives the same illusion that you are caring for something. Just be sure to dust it regularly and actually care for it!

 

Bring your Family & Friends into the Decor

Post your child’s artwork somewhere in your office where others can see it. If you have a home office, put it up where you can see it and change it regularly. You can also add photo frames on your desk or a shelf. When selecting a frame, choose a light colour like white or cream and one with rounded, soft edges. The subject matter of the photo should include a fun time with friends, family members or your pet.

Display your child’s art

Write Non-Work Related Stuff on your Calendar

Women write everything on their calendars! Write other people’s birthdays, write “My Birthday!” on your own birthdate! Make to do lists or doodle on the edges. Women even mark their calendar with a private symbol that means they started their period. When someone glances at your calendar, it should have at least 5 non-work related items on it per month.

Display Quotes and Inspiration

This has got to be one of the most feminine things you can add to your work space. And of course, you can’t just have one! You need a whole bunch of cluttered inspiration hanging off your computer screen, inside a cabinet door and tacked onto your bulletin board. Choose quotes or mantras that speak to you and pair them with images that inspire. If you don’t know how to get started, purchase a daily tear-off calendar and slowly build up a collection of your favourites. Stick them all around you and never take them down, just add, add, add! Other things you can display might be ticket stubs, postcards, notes from other people or other peoples’ business cards.

Display photos, quotes, memorabilia on your bulletin board

As you can see, there are a lot of subtle ways to add femininity into your personal work space. If you follow these simple tips, feminizing your office will be easy! Leave your tips in the comments area below!

 Take the next step on your feminization journey with an office feminizing analysis! Contact Lesada for this service today!

 

 

Shoe Shopping Guide for Crossdressers

Your Online Shoe Shopping Guide

With so much selection, how do you even begin to decide what shoes will help you put your best foot forward? Use the following filters to walk with ease through the selection process from toe to heel!

Shoe Sizing

If you can, it’s best to have your foot measured for the perfect fit. If you know your size in men’s wear, your size will most likely be 1.5-2 sizes larger in ladies.

Occasion

Next, it is best to decide when and where you will most often be wearing your new shoes. This will really help narrow down the type of shoe you are looking for, thus simplifying your search. It’s no use looking at sandals or open toe shoes if you plan to wear your shoes in the winter! Or, if you want to wear your shoes with a formal gown, you do not have to search among ballet flats.

Shoe Colour

Deciding on the colour you want ahead of time will also filter out a great deal in the shoe selection process. If you want a pair of shoes that will go with most outfits, stick with black, brown or beige. These colours aren’t nearly as exciting, but can be dressed up with accessories (see below). If you want a pair of statement shoes, try red, hot pink or electric blue.

With these basic filters in place, your online shoe shopping experience will be streamlined so you can have fun looking at all the options! Read on to see what else will help you find the perfect shoe so you can put your best foot forward!

Toe Style

Women’s shoes have a wide range of toe styles to suit everyone’s desires. Toe styles include:

  • Peep Toe: a closed upper portion on the toe area, with a small opening to show off the toes. It is recommended to wear peep toe in the summer with toe nail polish.
  • Closed Toe: no opening at all in toe area
  • Rounded Toe: closed toe that is rounded off, will shorted the look of your foot
  • Pointed Toe: closed toe that extends beyond the natural toe line, making the foot appear longer than it actually is.

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Shoe Body Style

Body type should hold as much importance as heel and toe style. Unfortunately you can’t filter out body style when searching online, but keep it in mind when you are looking. Body style of a shoe really affects the look of the length of your foot. If you are wanting to diminish the length of your foot, go for styles with straps. Straps will break up the expanse of your foot. Styles to look for are T-Strap, Thong or ones that have designs along the edge (see below). Also, you could go for an open body shoe, but add an ankle strap. An ankle strap will create the illusion of less space between ankle and leg.

Alternatively, if you are wanting to make your feet and legs look longer, opt for an open shoe style that allows a continuous space from toe to leg, such as the classic Pump or Stiletto.

versus

Heel Style

The last element to look for when choosing a shoe, is heel style. Super tall high heels may be sexy, but not if you are wobbling around and breaking your ankles! Know your limits and choose a heel style that you will feel comfortable in.

Platform shoes add 3.5-5″ to your height, so if you are wanting to down-play your stature, stick with a 1-2″ kitten heel or go up to 3″ with a pump or stiletto. If you want to dress up a pair of jeans or a cute little skirt, a ballet flat will be all you need to help you zip around town to run errands.

You should never drive while wearing a platform shoe or stiletto, as your heel could easily catch under the car pedal or on the floor mats. If you are driving to a function where you are going to wear heels, toss them in a bag to slip on later and wear a more practical shoe to drive and walk in.

Shoe Accessories

Check out all the fun shoe accessories available to turn your basic pumps into something stylish and fun! Choose from rhinestones, feathers, pom-poms, bows and more to clip on and help you put your best foot forward!

Happy Shoe Shopping!